Yet Another Breakdown........what is wrong with me??

I am so freaking tired right now. After tonight I feel like I have a huge weight lifted, even though everything isn't fixed yet. I should try doing what I did tonight more often. I feel better than I did a few hours ago. I just left the house and didn't have any idea of where I was going. I wanted to just get on the interstate and go somewhere really fast. but I didn't get far before I had to stop driving. I just sat there balling like a baby and thinking about how the last year I have ruined almost everything good in my life and it completely sucks. I felt more alone tonight than I have in a long time. But seeing him and his doggie made it so much better. I didn't want to leave at all, but I had to. So here I am again trying to do my homework for the millionth time while fighting to stay awake. So all that I am left with at the end of tonight is a wrist that kinda hurts, a sore throat, itchy eyes, and a busy mind.