TI thought I knew what love was, but I was wrong, this is love, he is everything I ever wanted and more. I've never cared so much about someone as I do for him. It kills me to see him like this, I wish I was the one who was sick, he doesn't deserve this. I can't function when he is so sick. Bad sleep, can't do anything right, I miss him even though he is right next to me. He is all I can think about. I wish I could do more to trip him and make him better. Wish he would listen to me and let me help him.
I'm feeling kinda down as well. Probably just a mix of him being sick and me hating work and being broke and being fat. I'm worthless and pathetic. I have no effect on anyone or anything. Whats the point of me even going to Rhodes? Its not like I'm smart enough or am actually gonna do anything with my life. I feel like I'm just a bother to him and to everyone else. I was more useful when I was sick.
I'm spoiled, thats wht I am. Haven't had to work to hard for stuff, mom always got me almost anything I wanted. Well I need to grow up and stop being a baby.
I do know he makes me happy, he makes it all go away. I just gotta be strong for him now, when he needs me (or I think he does). I can do this, I'd do anything for him.
Ok back to college. I'm going to fail out. I can't do it. I'm not smart enough. I'm to lazy and unsocialable. I'm gonna have a horrible roommate and hate it. I won't be able to see him everyday either.
Oh well time to grow up.
LOVE YOU RA!!!! Forever! Please dont ever leave me (unless you don't love me anymore).
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